Are you looking for signs he secretly likes you but is hiding it? There are many reasons why a guy might be hiding attraction, and he likes you but doesn’t want you to know. But how can you tell whether he’s really into you or just wants to be good friends?
Why is he hiding his feelings?
He’s confused about his feelings
The first reason why a guy might be hiding his real feelings from you is that he’s a little confused about them himself. He’s not sure how much he likes you yet or is slightly in denial, and he needs some time to work this all out.
He’s afraid you won’t feel the same way
Another reason why a guy likes you but hides it is he’s scared that you don’t feel the same way. Nobody likes rejection. And if he’s a little shy or low in confidence already, he might struggle to voice his feelings out of fear of looking like a fool and getting hurt.
One or both of you are already in a relationship
If you or he are in a relationship, then the respectful thing to do is to keep any feelings you have on the down low. It’s not fair to you or your significant other(s).
If you both like each other, the right thing to do is end your relationships before you even think of getting together. Newsflash: If the idea of being with someone else is even a tiny bit attractive, then you’re definitely in the wrong relationship.
He doesn’t want to ruin your friendship
Are you already good friends? Have you known each other a long time, or have you been through a lot together? Making a move from friends to something more is always tricky. If you decide to go for it, your friendship will never be the same again, and worse, you might lose it altogether. So it makes sense that he would want to tread very carefully and might be hiding his feelings.
He knows he’s not ready for a relationship
If all signs say that he likes you but is hiding it, that’s not always good. He might like you but still be hung up on another woman or know he’s not ready to commit to anyone. The good news is, he’s aware of it and is putting you first—kudos to that dude.
You’ve been there before and it didn’t end well
The final reason why he likes you but is hiding it is that he’s an ex, and you’ve already been there, done that, and bought the t-shirt. Things didn’t work out last time, and he’s apprehensive about giving it another go. Even if he has feelings for you, he knows that’s not always enough to make a relationship work.
16 signs he likes you but is hiding it
Here are things guys do when they secretly like you.
1. Eye contact
Does he quickly turn away and maybe even blush when you look at him?
When you sneakily peer at him from the corner of your eye, is he full-on staring at you?
This is one of the most unmistakable signs he likes you but is hiding it. A man can’t help but focus his attention on the woman he is most interested in, no matter where he is. And even though he might think he’s been oh-so-subtle, he may as well walk around holding a giant sign that says, “I’m into you, (your name).”
Look out for other body language cues that he secretly has feelings for you.
2. He flirts and teases you
Does he like me but is hiding it?
Pay attention to all signs of flirting.
That includes when he notices little things that you say or do, when he compliments you (especially on something non-physical), and when he playfully teases you.
Teasing and joking around is one of the easiest ways for a guy to flirt with you without being too direct. So, if the two of you always have good banter, that’s a strong sign he might have caught feelings.
3. He does more than follow you on social media
Friends follow you on social media, but a guy who likes you? He’ll do more than that.
He’ll always like, comment on and share your posts, even if they’re from yonks ago. He’ll support pages that belong to you, whether for a business or a charity event. He’ll watch and respond to your stories. He’ll frequently slide into your DMs—especially if he doesn’t yet have your mobile number. And even if he does have your number, social media can seem less direct and invasive, so if he’s trying to hide his feelings, this may be his preferred form of contact.
4. He shows you a different side of himself
How do you know if a guy secretly likes you? Another key indicator is that he transforms Jekyll & Hyde-style into a different person when he’s around you compared to when he’s with his friends, family, or coworkers.
Perhaps he becomes a little quieter or more nervous. Maybe he seems kinder and more attentive. Or he may even be more fun and confident when he’s with you.
If you began as friends and have noticed a shift in his behavior, that’s also a clear sign his feelings have changed. Maybe there’s now tension between you, or everything feels more intense.
5. His attention is 100% focused on you
One of the most telling signs he likes you but is hiding it is if you feel like his attention is entirely on you when you’re together. He isn’t checking out other women. He isn’t picking up his phone to read his messages or take calls. When you’re together, it feels like you have his undivided attention, and this is rare.
But this can be a good thing and a bad thing because he will literally notice everything. That piece of spinach wedged in your teeth. That day you got a little heavy-handed with your eyebrow pencil. That time you stacked it on the pavement and fell over head first on your way to meet him in the park. Yep, he sees it all.
6. He listens to you (and remembers)
Next up on our list of signs a guy likes you but is hiding it is he listens to and remembers pretty much every word you have ever said to him. The random Tuesday months ago when you told him about your fear of bagels. Last week when you told him about that guy you’re talking to (okay, he listened to this one, but that doesn’t mean he’s happy about it). Your favorite color, restaurant, outfit, book—the more you’ve spoken to this guy, the more facts he collects about you. Not in a creepy stalkerish way, but in an I-can’t-get-enough-of-you and everything-you-say-is-important-to-me kind of way.
When a guy likes you, he will go out of his way to ask you questions and learn more about who you are. And he’s not just doing it to pretend that he cares; he does care, and the proof is in the little things he remembers.
7. He keeps in contact regularly
Does this guy text you almost every day, find a way to chat to you at work, or regularly hit you on social media?
Here’s the deal: regular friends usually don’t talk that often. Think about how often you talk to your friends. Every few days? Once a week? Maybe even less, depending on how much you like them?
But this guy is consistent. He’ll go out of his way to find things for you to chat about, keep asking questions, and try to initiate conversations all the time.
Why? Because he loves talking to you. And he wants to stay at the forefront of your mind and make sure you don’t forget about him, even when you’re on that hot date with hot Sam Friday night. Especially then.
8. He finds a way to hang out with you
Another of the telltale signs he likes you but is hiding it is if he goes out of his way to be physically near you. Maybe that means he always sits near you in a meeting at work, or if you’re out as a group of friends, he’ll often walk with you, or you end up running into him at your favorite places (because he knows they’re your favorite places remember—he listens to everything you say!). He leaves a party at the same time you do, he offers to give you a ride (even when it’s totally out of his way), and if you’re ever organizing anything, you can count on him showing up.
9. He gets close to you
When a guy is attracted to you, he will subconsciously move closer to you. He’ll lean in when you’re talking, sit next to you, and maintain eye contact. Maybe he’ll lightly brush your arm or a loose strand of hair out of your face or hug you. He wants to be close to you, so he’ll get as close as possible without being weird.
This is also him testing the waters a little. When he hugs you, do you hug him back? When he lightly brushes your arm, do you feel something brewing in the air? He’s trying to get you to see him as more than just some guy.
10. He helps you
Does this guy go out of his way to help you?
One of the signs he likes you but is hiding it is he is always there to lend a hand any time you need it.
Maybe you moved house, and he helped you lift heavy boxes or drive a rental van across town. Your laptop froze on that blue screen of death, and he helped fix it. You’ve got a big dilemma at work, and he’s there to listen and give you some sage advice. Your car breaks down in the middle of nowhere, and he comes to pick you up. You’re organizing a big charity event in your community, and he offers to hang up flyers with you on a Saturday afternoon.
He cares about you and wants to be there for you in any way he can. He wants to be the first person you call anytime you need help.
11. He doesn’t mention other women
Think back on the conversations you’ve had with this guy.
Has he ever mentioned any other women romantically?
Another of the signs your guy friend likes you but is hiding it is if he keeps his love life as private as possible.
He doesn’t want you to think he’s interested in anyone else. Depending on how much he likes you, he might not have eyes for anyone else.
If he’s dating, he might share stories of disastrous dates and how he’s just not met the right person. He might also casually drop in that he’s single into your conversation, in case you weren’t sure. Or maybe he goes a step further and says he thinks the best relationships begin with best friends. FYI: he’s talking about you and him.
12. He gets jealous when you mention other guys
Following on from the point above, he doesn’t mention other women, and hearing you talk about other guys can set him off.
Whether you’re talking to another guy, going on dates, or even in a relationship, he doesn’t like it. And he’ll probably try and mask his jealousy and play it down, but underneath it all, he can’t stand it.
He might encourage you to question whether you’re with the right guy or make fun of the guys you’ve dated in the past. The bottom line is that he doesn’t want you to be with anyone else. No one will ever be good enough for you (apart from him, of course).
13. But he does want to know your relationship status
If a guy likes you but is hiding it, he’ll still want frequent updates on your relationship status to ensure he has a green light before putting himself out there. The last thing he wants to do is bulldoze in and ask you out only to hear you’ve already got a boyfriend: #awkward.
He might be direct and ask you if you’re seeing anyone or be more subtle and ask you what your type is. You may also notice him trying to emulate what you’ve described as your dream man. For example, if you tell him you want to meet an adventurous guy, he might start learning mandarin in his spare time or going rock climbing. If you tell him you want a guy who makes you laugh, he might come at you non-stop with jokes.
“Why did the banana go out with the prune?” he says.
“I don’t know,” she says.
“Because it couldn’t get a date.”
14. He tries to impress you
Does he like me but is hiding it? Well, does he go out of his way to impress you? Because if he does, then the answer is probably a big fat yes.
He pays careful attention to his appearance when he’s with you. Maybe you notice he’s bought a new shirt, done something different with his hair, or started wearing cologne.
He also (gently) brags about his achievements, like a promotion at work, acing a test, or hitting a goal in his business.
And he’ll do his best to show you he’s boyfriend material. He’ll open doors for you, offer you his jacket when you’re cold, be kind and respectful, and do his best to always do the right thing.
15. He’s supportive
Although he might be hiding that he likes you in a romantic way, his true feelings will come out in his actions. He will always be by your side and on your side, no matter what. He will encourage you to chase your dreams and help you achieve your goals, and take a genuine interest in supporting you in everything you do.
Maybe you decide one day that you want to open a cake shop. He’ll be there in your kitchen, sampling that first cake you make and telling you it’s delicious even though you know you majorly messed up the recipe and the dog has taken a hard pass on it.
Because he wants to champion you and help you believe in yourself the way he believes in you.
16. He makes jokes about liking you.
The final sign he likes you but is hiding it?
He makes jokes about liking you, asking you out, and dating you.
He’ll do it in such a casual, low-key way that if you react badly, he’ll just dismiss it as a joke and say he didn’t mean it. This way, his ego won’t take a public beating.
And if you react positively, he might test the waters a few more times. Once he feels confident enough that you’re not going to laugh in his face, he might confess his feelings or ask you out.
If he likes you but is hiding it, what should you do?
Okay, first things first, does this guy meet your love vision? What I mean by that is, when you think of the kind of man and relationship you want to attract, is he a good match? If you want to avoid getting into the wrong relationship, you have to make sure you choose to date the right men—the men who align with your values and the future you want to build.
If he does meet your love vision, then take some time to think about what this guy might be afraid of. Why is he hiding his feelings from you?
For example, if it’s a fear of losing your friendship, you could tell him that you think friendship is a great way to start a relationship. If it’s a fear of rejection, go out of your way to reciprocate his behavior (smile back, make eye contact, listen to him, tease him, etc.). And if you think he’s too shy and insecure ever to find the courage to ask you out, don’t be afraid to make the first move.
However, if he’s hiding his feelings because he’s afraid of commitment or not ready for a relationship right now, don’t put your life on pause and wait around for him to be ready. It doesn’t matter how much he likes you; if he’s not in the right headspace, he’s not going to be able to give you what you want. It’s time to yell NEXT and move on. Leave yourself open to meeting a man who is ready to commit to you.
Now that you’re all clued up on the signs a guy might like you but is hiding it, it’ll be far easier to spot the difference between a guy who likes you as a friend and a guy who likes you a heap more.
Is there a guy in your life who you think might secretly like you but is hiding it? What signs have you spotted from this article, and why do you think he’s hiding his feelings?
Tell me all about it in the comments below, ladies!