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3 Reasons Why Dating After 40 Is Better than Your 20s

3 Reasons Why Dating After 40 Is Better than Your 20s


In this movie, I’ll be busting that urban myth that dating in your 40s can not be far better than relationship in your 20s!

You are going to study the three essential good reasons why relationship in your 40s as an older female is much more empowering than dating as a young woman.

Carry these with you as you get on out there to entice the male and relationship you motivation.

Listed here are a few explanations why courting immediately after 40 is better than your 20s.

Purpose #1: You get what you see

When you get to your late 30s to 40s, the men you’re courting turn out to be substantially simpler to determine out. It’s crystal clear who he is and what he’s wanting for. And you can both take it or go away it, which saves you both of those a ton of time and heartache.

Explanation #2: You know who you are

The very same logic applies to you when you’re dating. As we get more mature, we commence to settle into who we are, and we come to be significantly clearer about what we’re wanting for. At this stage, you know how you tick, the form of lifetime you want, and the type of person and romance you need.

P.S. If you have not nonetheless designed your enjoy vision, verify out Minimal Love Action #2.

Purpose #3: You can start out to believe in your instincts

When you achieve your 40s, you can simply see by means of the tall, dark, handsome man who’s just looking to hook up. You have achieved a hundred variations of this person over the decades, and you can location his motives a mile away. With age will come wisdom, and you can begin to have faith in your intuition when relationship as an older girl and stay away from receiving included with the improper variety of man.



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16 Ways Guys Get Emotionally Attached To Women

16 Ways Guys Get Emotionally Attached To Women


Have you ever wondered, “how do guys get emotionally attached to women?”

I’ve been working as a dating coach for more than 12 years, and I’ve noticed that most women have no problem meeting men and establishing that initial physical attraction. The problem is developing that into something deeper, building emotional attraction, and moving things from the dating stage to an exclusive, committed relationship.

Men end up ghosting, flaking, or running hot and cold, leading to women thinking that all men are commitment-phobes who are only interested in hooking up. But this is not the truth. Most guys do want a long-term relationship. But unless they become attached to a woman on a deeper, emotional level, the physical attraction will eventually fade, and they’ll move on. Emotional attraction is the make or break of a relationship.

So, what exactly is emotional attachment, and what makes a man emotionally attached to a woman? Let’s find out.

What is emotional attachment?

What does it mean to be emotionally attached to a guy?

Emotional attachment is when a man develops intense feelings of closeness and/or affection to a woman that contributes to a long-term, meaningful relationship over time. When an emotional attachment is present, we feel safe, secure, and have a sense of belonging that enables us to open our hearts and be vulnerable with someone.

Do guys get as attached as women do?

Women are known for being more emotional and in touch with their feelings than men are. But men have just as many emotions as women, even if they aren’t as comfortable expressing them.

Men are a lot better at hiding their emotions. We learn to do this at a very young age when we’re told not to cry or to “man up” and are influenced by beliefs of a masculine-heavy society that discourages feminine behavior.

How do you know if a guy is emotionally attached?

When a man becomes emotionally attached to a woman, he will start to show up differently and say and do things that he wouldn’t do if he were merely physically attracted to her.

Signs he is emotionally attached to you:

  • He calls and texts you often (not at 2 AM – that’s a booty call)
  • He has told you he doesn’t want to see other people
  • He wants to see you often and spend quality time with you (outside of the bedroom)
  • He makes future plans with you
  • He shares feelings and personal matters with you
  • He asks for your opinion
  • He communicates with you during stressful periods
  • He lets himself be emotional with you
  • He introduces you to his loved ones

How do guys get emotionally attached? Here’s how to deepen your connection

1. Flirt with him

The first step in how to make a guy emotionally attached to you is to build a fun and flirty connection with him. Resist the urge to try and go too deep with a man too soon. You’ve got to let this happen organically and pace your relationship (more on this later).

Little Love Step #3 is about getting out the door, meeting quality men, and practicing your flirting skills to attract the man who matches your love vision. Flirting requires you to lean into your feminine energy, which will draw him to you. Who doesn’t love being flirted with? Over time, he’ll start associating you with feelings of happiness and familiarity, which is an integral foundation for getting him to open up and form an emotional connection.

2. Be intentional while dating

If you want to establish that all-important emotional attraction, you’ve got to be intentional with how you date. It’s normal to keep conversations light and surface-level when you first meet a man and get to know him.

“Where are you from?”

“What’s your take on peanut butter cups?”

“What’s your sign?”

But after the first few dates with a man, it’s natural to move things up a notch and start learning more about each other. The most important thing to remember here is to be intentional about when you go deeper. Too soon, and you’ll send the message that you’re a low-value woman. Wait too long, and things might fizzle out before they can heat up.

3. Be someone he loves being around

old couple embracing

We all know some Debbie Downers or Negative Neils constantly complaining or moaning about something. They’re like a permanent gray cloud, and there’s a 100% chance of rain anytime you’re standing near them.

No one enjoys being around someone like this. Why? Because it doesn’t feel good. It brings you and your vibration down to their level. It can sometimes feel like they’re actually draining the energy out of you like a blood-sucking vampire.

One of the key steps in forming an emotional attachment with a man is to make sure you’re a beacon of light and positivity. Men want to be around women who make them feel good. That doesn’t mean you must constantly be smiling and laughing – of course, we all have bad days. But when you’re with a man you’re dating, bring your A-game. You’ll be amazed how much better this makes you feel too.

4. Deepen the foundation of trust

You can’t trust a man you met in your local coffee house last week. Who knows who he is and what his intentions are? It’s impossible to know. But the more you get to know someone, the easier it becomes to trust them. Why? Because they’ve consistently shown up. You get a better sense of who they are. And they’ve had more opportunities to show you that they can (or cannot) be trusted.

In my exclusive coaching program Love Accelerator, I share what I call my trust formula.

5. The Trust formula = Consistency x Time

The more consistent someone is and the longer you’ve known them, the more you can trust them.

Building trust is one of the important parts of forming an emotional attachment. You can do this by coming through on your word, communicating effectively, being honest and consistent, and admitting when you’re wrong.

6. Go deeper in conversation

couple talking

How do guys get emotionally attached? Through deep, authentic conversations we don’t often have with other people in our lives. Think about it. How real are your exchanges with your co-workers, the guy who makes your coffee each morning, and the mailman? In reality, we tend to have surface-level conversations with most people, where the most exciting topic of discussion is usually the weather.

So, one of the best ways to build emotional attraction is to gradually go deeper in your conversations.

There are two ways to do this:

1. Ask more thoughtful questions (click here for ideas)

“What does a “perfect” day look like to you?”

“What’s the greatest achievement of your life so far?”

“How have you changed over the last five years?”

2. Ask why

Anytime he shares a thought or opinion with you, follow up with “why?” This is a great way to shift the conversation to a deeper setting.

7. Open up and be vulnerable

Opening up and being vulnerable with someone we don’t know is daunting. There’s a fear of being laughed at, feeling rejected, or humiliated, especially if this has happened in the past. But if you’re wondering how to get a guy emotionally attached to you, you’ve got to take a step to open up and be vulnerable with him. That doesn’t mean you bare your soul and lay everything out on the table on date number three. But it does mean starting to steer the conversation in a more intimate direction and having the courage to share some personal thoughts and feelings. If you open up, he’ll instantly feel more comfortable opening up to you.

8. Give him permission to be vulnerable

Even though we say we want men to be more emotional, many of us tend to cringe when we see them displaying emotions. Couple this with growing up in a society where boys are taught from birth that being vulnerable is weak, and you’ve got an army of men who keep everything bottled up.

If you want a man to get emotionally attached, you must first give him permission to open up and be vulnerable with you. You’ve got to make him feel comfortable enough to lean into his inner feminine and bare his feelings. Can he talk to you about anything? Do you actively listen to him? Are you able to reserve judgment?

He has to feel safe and secure enough with you to open up. He has to know you’ll respect him and be empathetic and understanding no matter what he shares.

9. Get emotionally intimate

A lot of women confuse physical intimacy with emotional intimacy.

Do men get emotionally attached after having sex? Not the way that women do. Women’s brains are wired to become more attached to someone they’ve slept with, which is why the whole casual hookup setup often ends in the woman developing feelings and getting hurt.

Newsflash: you don’t have to get physical with a man to build emotional attachment. In fact, it’s better to hold off on the physical side of things at first because this helps slow the pace of your relationship and gives him something to work for.

Having physical, meaningless sex is easy, but getting emotionally intimate is much more of a challenge.

So, how do you get more emotionally intimate with a man?

  • Get out of your comfort zone
  • Practice being an engaged listener
  • Create a safe space for him to open up
  • Take your time

10. Create emotional safety for him

how to know if a guy is attached to you

How do men develop an emotional attachment to women? By feeling like they can talk to you about anything. His hopes, dreams, and fears. When a woman is easy to talk to, a man will share things he typically wouldn’t share with anyone – even his closest friends. If he feels safe and without risk of being judged, he’ll be more willing to express his deepest thoughts and feelings.

So the next time he’s sharing a struggle at work with you, or having a moral dilemma about something, make him feel safe and comfortable. Be fully present when you listen to him. Reserve judgment. Sense when it’s time to listen versus offering help or fixing a problem. Sometimes men will want your opinion and help to solve something, but other times they’ll merely want you to listen. It’s true what they say: a problem shared is a problem halved.

11. Give him space to pursue you

I touched on the concept of pacing a little earlier in this article, which is what I call Little Love Step #5. A common mistake women make when dating a guy they like is taking things way too fast. They’ll see him, call, and text too much, creating a low-value vibe.

What happens?

The guy ends up pulling away and losing interest.

Why?

Because it’s too easy, there’s no chase. You’re handing him everything on a plate.

And when a guy starts pulling away, women will often try to overcompensate by taking complete control of the situation, calling all the shots in an attempt to create the relationship they desire. But this positions you as the chaser and leaves the guy as the one being chased, which most men aren’t comfortable with, so they end up withdrawing even further.

One of the best ways to get a guy emotionally attached to you is by giving him space to pursue you. Let him be the chaser. Don’t play games, but be naturally hard to get because you have a vibrant life without him. This is attractive and will naturally draw men to you even more.

12. Accept him for who he is

Human beings are flawed – we all have our strengths and weaknesses. And being in a relationship often makes us more aware of our flaws as we try to build a shared life with another person. If you want to create an environment where a guy gets emotionally attached to you, you’ve got to show him that you accept him for all of him – flaws and all.

On the other hand, if you poke fun at his weaknesses or judge or criticize him, he’s likely to shut down and withdraw from you because he feels unaccepted. So don’t try to change him. If you can’t accept and appreciate him the way he is, it’s time to date someone else!

FYI: I’m not talking about deal-breaker weaknesses here like being verbally abusive or a pathological liar or refusing to communicate – flaws like these have to be addressed and resolved; otherwise, there’s no chance of building a healthy relationship.

13. Appreciate him

what makes men emotionally attached

When was the last time you made your man feel truly appreciated? Guys get emotionally attached to women when they express gratitude and appreciation for them. Everyone likes to feel wanted.

So think about small things he does or says that mean a lot to you. Send him a text, leave a note in his jacket pocket, or tell him the next time you’re cuddled up on the sofa.

“I really appreciate it when you do X.”

“When you say X, it makes me feel Y.”

“I love the way you do X.”

14. Maintain your independence, but make him feel needed

I always tell my clients that no man will want a life with you unless you have an amazing life without him. That means maintaining your independence at all times, even after getting into an exclusive relationship with a man. Have your own job, your own apartment, your own friends, and your own hobbies and interests. You should be happy and thriving without him.

If you become too dependent on a man, he’s likely to pull away. Strike a healthy balance between nourishing yourself, spending quality time with him, and making him feel needed. This is the sweet spot for developing that all-important emotional connection.

15. Be patient

Women often form emotional attachments more easily than men, and some men end up going at a snail’s pace to “get there.”

So, how long should you wait before giving up on him completely and shouting my favorite four-letter word, “NEXT?”

If you’ve been dating a guy for 3-4 months and there are still no signs that he is getting emotionally attached to you, don’t automatically write him off. He may be dealing with some past experiences where he’s been hurt. Sometimes you need to give a guy a little more time – every man is different. So be patient, but don’t wait around forever, and let him know that you’re not prepared to.

16. Create clear boundaries

Here’s how to get someone emotionally attached to you: know your boundaries and communicate these to him. This is what I call Little Love Step #6. A high-value man will respect you for your honesty. When you’re ready for an exclusive relationship, it’s vital that you make this clear and set the foundation of your new relationship. This is key if you want your relationship to thrive long-term.

Conclusion

So that’s how guys get emotionally attached to women. And if you follow the Little love Steps when dating, you’ll naturally build a connection over time that is both emotional and physical with a man who meets your love vision and the shared life you want to develop.

Over to you. What’s the biggest giveaway sign that a man you’re dating or in a relationship with has become emotionally attached to you? Let me know in the comments below!

how do you know when a guy is emotionally attached



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Does He Like Me More Than A Friend? 27 Signs He Does

Does He Like Me More Than A Friend? 27 Signs He Does


Most girls have at least one male friend in their life who they’ve known for some time, and at some point, it crosses their mind, “does he like me more than a friend?” Is he pining for you like a lost Labrador puppy, or are you firmly in the friendzone?

Maybe you’re recent office buddies or have been best friends for years, and you’re starting to feel that the friendly vibes are transitioning into something more. Perhaps he looks at you just a little longer than he used to, or your conversations are getting flirtier each day. But it’s often tricky to know if it’s harmless banter or if there are genuine deeper feelings there. You probably don’t feel comfortable talking about it with him or even your girlfriends just in case it gets back to him, and you’ve got the total wrong end of the stick. It’s not worth ruining your friendship over.

So, in this article, I’ve put together an extensive list of signs he secretly likes you more than a friend.

Does he like me more than a friend? 27 signs he likes you more than a friend

1. You catch him looking at you

One of the first signs a guy likes you more than a friend is if his eyes seem always to be locked on you, whether you’re sitting next to each other at work or across the room at a party. If it appears lately, whenever you look over at him, he is already looking at you or quickly diverts his gaze and turns a shade of bubblegum pink; he might like you more than a friend. Either that or he’s in some weird never-ending staring contest with you that he doesn’t want you to know about!

Men are very visual creatures and naturally focus on the person they are most attracted to in a room.

2. He likes all of your social media posts

Granted, social media is not real life. But if a guy is following you on all platforms and makes a conscious effort to like and comment on all your posts, join any groups or events you create, watch your stories, and slide into your DMs; there’s a strong chance he is crushing on you. Especially if he’s always sending you fire and heart emojis 🔥😍.

3. His body language says he likes you as more than a friend

It’s easy to control what we say and do, but our body language often gives our true feelings away without us realizing it.

For example, you might say you’re happy to be in a team meeting at 5.30 PM on a Friday, but the fact that you’ve had your arms crossed the entire time and haven’t smiled once at your boss’s crummy jokes signals that you would rather be anywhere else.

Body language signals that he likes you more than a friend:

  • He makes regular eye contact
  • He smiles at you
  • He positions his body toward you
  • His body language mirrors yours
  • He stands up taller
  • He touches you (in a non-creepy way)

4. He’s always happy to see you

The next time you’re wondering, “does he like me more than a friend?” pay attention to his energy when he’s with you. A man who lights up, smiles, laughs, and is generally in a positive mood when you’re with him is a man who is probably happy to see you. On the other hand, if his mood is always the same and he doesn’t act any differently around you, he might see you as a friend. And there is a chance he’s just a super happy guy, but in my experience, no one is that happy all the time!

5. He laughs a lot around you

A Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin study reported that laughing at a person’s joke might be a deep-rooted sign of attraction. So, if the guy in question is constantly laughing at your jokes, and you know you’re no comedian, he might be attracted to you. The real test is if he laughs at your jokes more than others, especially his guy friends. A guy laughing with you a lot is a sign he finds it enjoyable and comfortable to be around you.

6. He teases you

Do you remember in school how if a boy liked you, he would often tease you? Boys don’t grow up that much (not that you need me to tell you that). Teasing in a brilliant way to flirt as a kid and as an adult, just as long as he’s not taking the joke too far! You’ll giggle and feel closer to one another, and that’s his aim. Just remember to give as good as you get.

7. He’s interested in you

When I say interested, I mean he is curious about who you are and what makes you tick. He might ask you about your dreams, passions, family, fears, and thoughts on lobster tacos. A guy who likes you more than a friend wants to know everything about you and how he can support and please you.

If it turns out you’re into lobster tacos just as much as he is, don’t be surprised if he whisks you away for lunch on your break and introduces you to the most scrumptious tacos you’ve ever eaten!

8. You make him nervous

If you’re dealing with a shy guy, the alternative to him always being happy and smiley around you is someone who constantly seems nervous, on edge, anxious, shifty, awkward, and maybe a little uncomfortable. If he’s like that all the time with everyone, it isn’t easy to gauge whether he has caught feelings. But if he’s only like this around you, there’s a high probability that he likes you more than a friend.

9. He always asks for your opinion

When a man asks for your opinion, it’s because he values your thoughts and appreciates getting your expertise on issues in his life. Now, if you’re good friends with someone and have known them for a long time, it’s normal to talk serious matters through with them and get their two cents.

So, how do you know if it’s more than a friendly thing? Pay attention to what he’s asking your opinion on. If it’s things he doesn’t really need your opinion on, like what color suit he should wear to his friend’s wedding or what type of sandwich he should get for lunch, he’s probably just coming up with excuses to talk to you because he likes you!

10. He initiates contact

Does he often text you out of the blue to say hi, send you funny memes, and even double text you when you haven’t had time to reply?

One of the subtle signs he likes you more than a friend is if he calls you rather than just texting you or messaging you on social media. Calling is becoming something of a dying art. The next generation doesn’t even understand the concept of a phone that is not a cellphone 😂. So if he’s making an effort to pick up the phone, it’s either because he’s old school and still doesn’t know how to text or because you mean something to him.

11. He doesn’t leave you waiting to hear from him

man texting

The only time ghosting has ever been romantic was with Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore. And a guy who likes you more than a friend will never ghost you. In fact, he’s probably reaching out to you more than you reach out to him. He’s waiting on your replies and stopping what he’s in the middle of to respond – men and women who are just friends don’t typically do this.

12. He talks to you differently

Does he like you as a friend or more? If you’re not sure, consider how he acts around others compared to you. For example, is he typically a macho alpha male with his buddies but comes across as much softer when he’s with you? And how does he act with other women compared to you? If he’s regularly displaying the body language signals I touched on earlier when he’s with you but not with other women, there’s a chance you’re special to him.

13. He compliments you

When a guy likes you more than a friend, he will notice and like more things about you than the average person and want to share those things with you. And it won’t just be physical compliments, either. A guy who is attracted to you is more likely to compliment you on something non-physical. If he’s trying to be discrete, he might tell you that your presentation at work was great or that you handled a situation with your friends well.

14. He invites you places as his plus one

Are you always the one who gets the call to be his plus one at a dinner party or a friend’s wedding? And when you’re out together, people may often mistake you for a couple.

A man who sees you as just a good friend might invite you to be his plus one on the odd occasion, but if you’re regularly showing up by his side, it’s probably because he wants you by his side for the long run.

15. You’ve met his nearest and dearest

signs he wants more than friendship

Would you invite a guy you barely know or care about to meet your closest friends and family members?

Heck no!

Similarly, a guy will not introduce you to his inner circle unless he feels close to you, is proud of you, and sees you in his future. If he’s going out of his way to bring you into his world and is eager to know if you like his nearest and dearest, this is a clear sign he likes you more than just a friend.

16. He knows you better than most people

Does it feel like this guy knows you better than most people in your life, except your best friend? He pays attention to the tiniest details like your favorite song, your irrational fear of cheddar, the holiday season you love most, and the exact way you like your oat latte at Starbucks. And he notices when something about you changes like you get a new hairstyle or you’re feeling down about something. The less time he has known you, the more impressive this is, and the more likely it is that he likes you more than a friend.

17. He makes an effort to show you that you’re a priority

When you hang out together, does he always go the extra mile? For example, he picks you up and drops you back at your place, he is happy to meet you somewhere close to you after work, so you don’t have to travel, you turn up at the restaurant, and your favorite drink is sitting there for you, or he puts effort into choosing an activity he knows you’ll love. This is him showing you that you matter to him.

18. He’s willing to drop everything for you

Have you ever had an emergency, like when you read an article that said Love Island was being canceled or Whole Foods discontinued your favorite almond butter? Okay, it’s usually something a little more pressing than this. But no question asked this guy is there for you at the drop of a hat. He wants to ensure you’re okay and will go out of his way to make everything right again.

19. He invests in you

I don’t just mean money here; I mean time, energy, and yes, money. Usually, with friends, you’ll go dutch for things or take turns to treat each other, and you don’t go above and beyond to “woo” each other. So if this guy is constantly stepping things up a notch, won’t let you pay for anything, and devotes a significant amount of his free time and attention to you, this strongly indicates that he likes you more than a friend.

20. He makes regular one-on-one plans with you

How do you tell if someone likes you or just wants to be friends?

Does he see you as a friend or more? Well, think about how often you hang out with him as part of a group versus on his own. A guy who sees you as a friend won’t hang out with you one on one much. But a guy who is attracted to you more deeply will want you all to himself. So if he’s regularly arranging to see you one-on-one, he might have caught feelings.

21. He’s consistent

In my exclusive dating program Love Accelerator, I share my trust formula with women. It goes like this:

Trust level = Consistency x time.

The more consistent a man is and the longer you’ve known him, the more you can trust him. And this applies to anyone, whether you’re dating them or not.

If a man consistently shows up for you and gives you unwavering attention, he may see you as more than a friend.

22. He never talks about other women

This goes for ghosts of girlfriends past, women he’s currently dating, or any celebrity he thinks is beautiful – unless, of course, he thinks you look like said celebrity. In that case, he’ll tell you he thinks you look like her and make sure you know that he thinks she’s attractive, i.e., he thinks you’re attractive.

If he’s into you, he’s likely to avoid the dating question altogether or tell you he’s holding out for someone special.

23. And he doesn’t like it when you talk about other guys

If you’re currently seeing someone or you ever name-drop an ex or that you think the barista was cute, he freaks out. And if he likes you more than a friend, he might try to hide his true feelings or tell you that guy is a jerk and not nearly good enough for you because, in his eyes, the only guy who will ever be good enough for you is him.

24. He remembers what you tell him

man helping woman move

We pay attention to the people and things we’re interested in. So if he’s listening to what you say and remembering it, it means he’s interested. Especially if it’s random, minute details like that one time a baby elephant hosed you in water on holiday in Sri Lanka or that pair of gorgeous Jimmy Choos you spotted in the window the other day and said you liked.

On the other hand, if you’ve told him you have a major allergy to strawberries and he invites you out strawberry-picking, you’re probably just friends and not even that close.

25. He touches you (but not in a creepy way)

When a man likes you romantically, he will want to be as close to you as possible without coming across as weird, needy, aggressive, or creepy. So maybe he gives you a high five, a hug, or brushes a strand of hair away from your face. He is physically drawn to you like a honey bee to a flower.

26. He’s protective of you

Does he instinctively put his arm out in front of you if you’re crossing a busy street and he’s worried you’re about to jump into traffic? Does he stand up for you if someone is giving you a hard time or being rude? Does he stay up and call you when he knows you’re out late to ensure you get back safe?

When a guy likes a girl, he will instinctively go out of his way to protect her.

27. Other friends think something’s going on between you

Are both of your friends constantly asking if something’s going on between you, telling you to hurry up and date already, or saying you’ll end up married in ten years? Your closest friends are likely to spot it if real feelings are involved, even if you’re oblivious to it!

What to do if he likes you more than a friend

If you’re certain that he likes you more than a friend, you’ve got two options.

If you like him more than a friend too

This is great! A study by the University of Texas found that 40% of couples were friends first before they started dating, and we all know how well that ended up for Monica & Chandler on Friends.

The next step is to sit down and have an honest conversation. You could wait for him to bring it up, or if you’re feeling brave, you can make the first move. Discuss how you’ll handle things if dating doesn’t work – will you be able to salvage a friendship? How important is your friendship to you?

If he’s just a friend to you

If you know in your heart there’s no way this guy could be any more than a friend to you, then do your best not to give him any mixed signals or false hope, and don’t take advantage of his feelings toward you.

Prepare for him to declare his feelings to you eventually. Avoid spending too much time one on one. And make a point of mentioning other guys you’re dating so that you’re being clear you’re not interested in pursuing anything with him (don’t do this once he declares his feelings for you because that’s just cruel).

Conclusion

Is there a guy friend in your life, and you’re wondering, “does he like me more than a friend?” Tell me all about it in the comments below!

does he like me as a friend or more



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16 Reasons Why Ghosters Always Come Back & How To Handle It

16 Reasons Why Ghosters Always Come Back & How To Handle It


A survey by the Huffington Post in 2015 found that over half of people dating have experienced ghosting. According to a survey by Hinge in 2020, a staggering 91% of their users reported being ghosted at least once. 40% of those users who did the ghosting claimed they did so because they thought it was the least hurtful way to convey they were no longer interested, yet 85% of participants said they would rather be told that someone isn’t into them than be ghosted. And as if ghosting isn’t confusing and painful enough already, there seems to be another vicious weapon in the ghoster’s arsenal: the comeback. Yes, the burning question I’m answering in this article is: why do ghosters always come back?

What happens when a ghoster comes back?

It’s always a variation of:

“Heyyy, how are you?”

“You look great.”

“I was just thinking about you…”

But never:

“I’m sorry I was an a**hole and disappeared instead of telling you how I felt. That’s on me; I was going through X/Y/Z. You deserve way better than that.”

And, like clockwork, the ghost resurfaces the very moment that you finally stopped thinking about him. Your life is good. You got a promotion at work, you just booked a summer vacation to Greece with your girlfriends, and you flirted with a handsome man at your tennis club last week.

Cue the ghost. It’s as if he’s inside your head. “Oh, look at that; Jenny’s life is great right now; I’d better text her…

So, why is he back? Deep down, does he regret what he did and want to make things right, or is he just bored sitting home alone on a Friday night and playing games again?

What is it called when a ghoster reappears?

When a man you’re talking to or dating suddenly vanishes without any explanation, it’s called ghosting. And when a ghost resurfaces months or even years later, he transitions from being a ghost into a zombie.

How long does it take for a ghoster to come back?

Do ghosters come back after months? Yes, and sometimes, they return after years, pretending nothing ever happened. There’s no set timeline for when a ghost will plot his big comeback.

Here’s what I want you to know:

  • Everyone has their flaws, but ghosts are usually at the bottom of the barrel.
  • Good men do not ghost people and then return without a darn good apology (anything other than his Grandmother dying/him losing his job/realizing he’s gay is not good enough).
  • A high-value woman knows it’s not her job to enable his careless, entitled behavior by responding.

What percentage of ghosters come back?

There’s no accurate figure on the number of ghosters who come back, but the reason why they have a name for always returning is because a large number of them do. They can’t help themselves. They are serial ghosters. I feel like there should be a support group for guys like this by now? “Hi, my name’s Barry, and I’m a ghost-aholic.

16 reasons why ghosters always come back

1. Because he’s bored

The reason a ghost ghosts in the first place is often because he’s bored or over talking to you. Now, he finds himself bored of something or someone else, so he reaches out to you—what a toxic, messed up cycle.

If the message you receive is completely generic and void of effort, e.g., “Hey,” you can bet it’s because he’s got nothing else to do but search through his phone and hit up every woman who might be single.

2. Because he wants his ego fed

Why do ghosters always come back? Because they’re looking for a quick ego boost with minimal effort. He’s feeling down, sorry for himself, or maybe someone just ghosted him. So, even though he does not care how you are or how much he hurt you, he’ll reach out to see if you respond. And if you do? His ego will smirkingly say, “I knew she still had feelings for me all this time 😏.”

He wants to prove that he can pick you up and drop you whenever he pleases.

Prove him wrong and shout my favorite four-letter word, “NEXT!”

do men come back after ghosting

3. Because he’s a narcissist

A narcissist believes the world revolves around them, and ghosters are often the same. He knew that disappearing off the face of the earth and leaving you without closure was wrong, but he did it anyway. And now that he’s back, the possibility that you might ignore him and hit the block button isn’t even on his radar. Why? Because, whether it has been weeks, months, or even years, he assumes that you’ve been pining over him all this time. Because that’s the kind of man every woman dreams of meeting, right? A narcissistic coward who thinks it’s okay to treat people like props.

4. Because he’s immature and oblivious to what he did

Okay, brace yourself for this one because it’s a tough pill to swallow. Sometimes, a ghoster comes back into your life because he genuinely is not aware that he has done anything wrong.

What do you mean it’s not cool to take a woman on a date then not respond to any of her messages ever again, even after telling her I had a great time and want to see her again, then resurface a year later and say, ‘hey’?

Yes, this is perhaps the most infuriating of all the reasons on this list. Because somewhere in his mind, he has concluded that ignoring you until you got the message was an acceptable way to behave.

5. Because he doesn’t know what he wants

When you’re dating different guys and exploring new connections (Little Love Step #4), you’re bound to encounter people who don’t know what they want. The problem is that they tell women they know what they want. One minute he tells you he loves burritos, but a few dates later, he’s saying how gross burritos are. And it’s the same when it comes to his love life. He’ll make a date with a woman, then flake out at the last moment because he’s not in the mood. He’ll say he’s over his ex, then a few months later, what do you know, he’s back with his ex.

Men like this are flakey and distracted in every part of their lives. Is he in or out? Who cares? Don’t wait around for him to figure it out. Indecision is a decision.

6. Because he thinks you’re too nice to shut him down

Are you the kind of woman who always gives people second, third, fourth, heck, thirteenth chances? It’s your default setting to see the good in everybody, even if there’s more bad than good, even after they’ve hurt you. You have real trouble saying no, setting boundaries, and putting your happiness above everyone else’s.

Another reason why ghosters always come back is because they think you’re too nice to call them out on their BS. He thinks he can get away with coming in and out of your life whenever he pleases, without any consequences.

If this sounds familiar, it’s up to you, sexy single lady, to focus on Little Love Step #1 – love yourself, recognize your value, and never settle for anything less again.

woman on phone

7. Because he misses how you made him feel

When a ghoster comes back, you might try to convince yourself it’s because he realized he made the worst mistake of his life and wants to give things another go. But he might not miss you; he might just miss how you made him feel.

Maybe you were always his go-to when he was stressed at work. Maybe you were his midnight booty call, and he just misses the physical comfort of sex. Maybe he misses that shared interest you had now that you’re no longer in his life.

Men who ghost tend to be users. They don’t miss a person; they miss what they used to get from that person.

8. Because he can’t handle you moving on

Have you ever had a guy ghost you, and then the moment you moved on and started dating someone else, they came knocking? He sees you out to lunch with a man who’s not him, and that’s his cue to “check in.” Either he still loves you (does he, though?), or you’ve dented his pride. This is probably a classic case of a guy not wanting to be with you but not wanting anyone else to be with you. He may even promise you that he’s changed and beg you to give him a second chance, only to ghost you for a second time.

If he genuinely wants to be with you deep down in his heart, he’s got to work a lot harder than that to regain your trust before you even think about taking him back.

9. Because he wants the “girlfriend experience” without the commitment

Why do ghosters always come back? Because some of them want the benefits of having a girlfriend without the commitment. You know what I’m talking about: the reassuring texts, the emotional connection, the knowing that someone is always there if you need them. But if he’s not giving you the commitment you want, don’t give him the benefits of being in a relationship! Tell him to quit being so greedy – he cannot have it both ways.

10. Because he saw a hot photo of you online

Just because a guy appears to vanish into the dark abyss, it doesn’t mean he has disappeared. He’s probably a lot closer to home than you think (let’s just hope he’s not hiding behind a tree in your front yard).

If there was a spark between you at some point, there’s a strong possibility that he is still stalking you online (this is known as haunting). The minute you post a stunning photo of yourself lounging on a friend’s yacht in Saint Tropez, this guy will reach out. Why? Because he’s kicking himself for ever letting you go, even though he still doesn’t want to be with you.

He can look all he wants, but he can’t touch. Carry on living your best life.

woman in bikini ocean

11. Because he’s keeping you on the back-burner

Okay, brace yourself for this because it won’t sound great.

Some guys will know that they’re not into a girl, but they will vaguely stay in touch with her just in case things don’t work out with plan A, aka, the woman they’re really interested in. Hence the term “back-burner.”

One of the reasons why ghosters come back is they got dumped, or things didn’t work out as planned, and now they’re seeing if they can worm their way back into your life. They never directly end things with you because they want the option to pick you back up in the future. But you’re like a puppy: for life, not just for Christmas. NEXT.

12. Because he’s rebounding

Another possibility is this guy is freshly on the rebound, and even if he has no intention of talking to you for more than one night, he will contact you. He’s hurting, feels lonely, and wants someone or something to make the pain go away. Why bother hitting an online dating site or bar when he already knows you, and he believes there’s a good chance you’ll respond?

The bottom line is that ghosters are lackadaisical. They’re all about minimal effort and maximum reward. Just make sure none of those rewards are coming from you.

13. Because he’s curious about what you’re up to now

Because the ghoster never officially ended things, anything is still possible in his mind. So if he happens to be stalking on Instagram or scrolling through his WhatsApp contacts, he might just stumble on a gorgeous, intriguing photo of you, and curiosity will get the better of him. He wants to know where you are, what you’re up to, and who you’re with. He wants to know if you’re single or taken. He wants to know if you’re happy or lonely. And he wants to know if you’re still holding a grudge over what he did to you or if you’re up for “hanging out,” i.e., sex.

Let him wonder, ladies, because it’s none of his damn business what you’re up to.

what to do when a ghoster comes back

14. Because he’s lazy

What’s easier than meeting new women and forming new connections?

Texting all the women whose numbers are saved on your phone and seeing if any of them will give you the time of day.

This is how ghosters operate. They come back into your life because they’re lazy. And if he’s showing clear signs of laziness before you’re even dating, just imagine what else he might be lazy with. Showering, remembering your birthday, foreplay…

15. Because he’s entitled, cocky, or stupid

Why do ghosters always come back? There are a few common themes running between all the guys who are serial ghosters: entitlement, stupidity, and the smug factor.

When someone ghosts you in the first place, this demonstrates how selfish and careless they are with other people’s hearts. And when they return weeks, months, or years down the line, it’s yet another demonstration of how they just don’t give a f*ck about you. They are not thinking about you, they have never been thinking about you, and they will never be thinking about you. This guy’s tune is always me me me.

16. Because he genuinely misses you and feels terrible about what he did

I’ve put this last on the list because this is the rarest of all reasons why ghosters come back. Too many women want to believe that this is the only reason a guy resurfaces after disappearing, but sadly, this is not the case.

Do ghosters miss you?

Most of the time, a ghoster doesn’t miss you. I know a text that says “I miss you” can be confusing, but this is just a throwaway line to mess with your head.

So, how do you know if a ghost is being genuine?

He will tell you he is sorry for the way he behaved, and he will have a darn good reason to back it up with. Ninety-five percent of the time, this won’t happen.

If the text is missing either of these things, bin him and don’t give that text another thought.

However, if the message he sends ticks both these boxes, and you decide to give him a second chance, proceed with caution and set some boundaries this time around (this is known as Little Love Step #6).

How do you respond to a Ghoster who comes back?

You’ve got three options.

  1. IGNORE him and hit the block button (remember, you do not owe him a response).
  2. If you can’t take the high road, send him a witty dig like “No thanks, I’ve moved on,” then hit that block button.
  3. Only decide to give him a second chance if he has a good reason for ghosting in the first place (ie. a family member died) and has apologized for it.

Conclusion

Are you tired of all these ghosts and zombies haunting you? What’s a lady got to do to find a kind, decent man who will take her to dinner then say he will call and actually call the next day?

Here’s the secret: be too busy dating other guys to care when a ghost disappears and resurfaces months or even years later. This is what I call Little Love Step #4, and it’s all about meeting as many high-value men as possible, exploring new connections, and never chasing anyone (because you are the prize).

Has a ghost ever come back into your life pretending like nothing ever happened?

What did you do?

Tell me about it in the comments below!

why ghosters always come back



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These are the biggest trends in swimwear for 2022

These-are-the-biggest-trends-in-swimwear-for-2022

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There are two words that for many years, women heard in awe: bikini season. The idea of ​​wearing your swimsuit (μαγιό) and going to the beach, for many women, instead of being synonymous with carefreeness, well-being and beautiful, summer memories, has been linked to his fear of showing off our bodies. Isn’t that a bit tragic? The roots of the wrong patterns are so deep that as the weather “warms up”, dietitians get to work. The goal is now one: to build a body for the beach.

Obviously this is not reprehensible. It’s nothing if you do it without hurting other people. But do we hurt ourselves like that? It is important to do things that make us happy. Things that are our choices and not orders of a flawed society. Let this season be more enjoyable, without taboos and help us to deal slowly with our insecurities. Hoping that this will make us love ourselves more. Let this be a season that while reading about swimwear trends for 2022, we will be excited, instead of scared.

Because we will imagine ourselves wearing these trends and we will be inspired to try something new, whatever our body type. I believe that after two years of pandemic, after two difficult years, this summer will be the least liberating. Swimwear trends for 2022, in part, urge us to achieve this. Through bold cuts, interesting materials and plenty of inspiration from the 80s, this year’s trends challenge us to try new things.

80s, glam, shine, comfort: Swimwear trends for 2022 have it all

This is the first summer we do after two years, when we can feel free. Society has almost returned to its good old habits and this has a clear impact on swimwear trends for 2022. There is a need for glam, and this in fashion has been confirmed in many ways so far. This also affects the trends in swimwear, which, while they may be on the verge of kitsch, are ideal to excite us again for fashion.

This, comes to meet this “break free” mood associated with female, sexual liberation. Somehow, cut-outs and the tiniest designs make their presence felt this year. The influence of the fashion of the ’80s, which when it comes to swimwear, introduced us to the high leg styles, the gold chains and the shiny details, also contributes to this.

Of course, styles that we have worn in recent years, such as high-waisted swimsuits and soft, rib and knitted fabrics, remain in the “front line” of trends, offering even more options to women, to find the right one for their style.

All this is accompanied by the inclusion in the body types that we see exist, from the sizes to the campaigns of the swimwear brands, where various types of beauty are displayed. All this helps us to see a little differently in this era in which we are slowly entering. Thus, the famous “swimsuit season” may become more enjoyable, and through it we can experiment with our beach style, trying new styles.

Chain, chain, chain

Think of chains instead of laces, large gold rings connecting two fabrics together and generally anything that celebrates gold jewelry and accessories. Instead of wearing them around your neck and arms, you will now “wear” them in your swimsuit.

Shine on me

Designers do not want to spend indifferent this summer, since one of the biggest trends in swimwear for 2022 is shiny fabrics. The range is wide. From swimsuits in glitter fabrics to the most shiny, lingerie type (back to the 80s), with this trend you will shine.

Higher than ever

Inspired by the 50s and 60s, the high-waisted swimsuits have their honorary and this year. With the house of Chanel bringing the high-waisted bikini sets to the catwalk, this style becomes again one of the musts of the season. From high leg highs to the most traditional bottoms, this “trend” is timeless.

Tie me up

One of the trends in swimwear for 2022, “brings” some of our most favorite accessories and incorporates them in swimwear. Aka belted swimsuits with a belt, return, offering us effortlessly elegant beach looks. You will see these belts, in one-piece swimsuits, but also in bottoms, thus offering us options.

Cut it out

Cut-outs are already a big trend in clothes and now it is “transferred” to the trends in swimwear for 2022. Somehow, our swimsuits automatically become sexier and more interesting, while allowing us to express our sexiness through these unique designs.

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25 Undeniable Signs He Has Strong Feelings For You

25 Undeniable Signs He Has Strong Feelings For You


What are the signs he has strong feelings for you? Whether he’s a friend or someone you’ve been dating for a while, it can be challenging to gauge where his head and heart are. Men can be difficult to read (if you don’t know what to look for), and there’s a good chance he’s sending you mixed messages. One day you’re out for dinner, and the conversation flows back and forth. Before you know it, you’re the only two left in the restaurant, and the staff is nudging you out the door. The next day, you’re lucky if you get two words out of the guy—he’s struggling to string a single sentence together. You’re starting to worry he has an identical twin brother, and they’ve been pulling a switcheroo on you.

Does he like me?

Does he hate me?

Does everyone know what’s going on here apart from me?

In this article, I’m sharing all the signs he has strong feelings for you (for real), and by the end, you will finally know where you stand.

Sound good?

Let’s dive in.

Why are men not vocal about their feelings?

We live in a society where boys and men who express vulnerability are labeled “weak,” “sissy,” or “girls” (let’s stop doing that). So what do they learn? They have to walk around like strong, rugged, uber-masculine action heroes—like a “real” man.

This is one of the primary reasons a man won’t verbally admit that he has feelings for a woman. He thinks it makes him weak if he leans into that emotional, sweet, vulnerable side of himself. So he bottles everything up (super healthy, not). Other men are naturally shy and insecure, which means they’ll be even less likely to tell you how they feel.

However, as much as they try to mask their feelings, they will usually seep out, and it’s easy to miss. He will say or do little things that he won’t do for every woman, and this is his way of signaling that he has strong feelings for you.

Signs he doesn’t have strong feelings for you

Before we jump in, let’s quickly go over some of the signs that a guy does not have strong feelings for you:

  • He often talks to you about other women he’s attracted to or dating.
  • He calls you “buddy” or “friend.”
  • His schedule is always full when it comes to hanging out with you.
  • You only spend time with him as part of a group.
  • He doesn’t reply to your texts as much as he should.
  • He ignores you in public.
  • It doesn’t matter to him if he doesn’t talk to you or see you for long periods.
  • He always brings up the word “friendship” with you.
  • You have never had a conversation that goes beyond the superficial, day-to-day.

If a man does any of these things, he doesn’t want to be your boyfriend.

25 signs he has strong feelings for you

Here’s how to tell if a guy has feelings for you

1. He stares at you a lot

I said men are afraid to be vulnerable; I didn’t say they were subtle. And the way a man stares at a woman he has strong feelings for is not subtle!

Do you often catch his eyes on you? Do you feel him watching you, even if he’s across the room? And when you catch him in the act, does he smile or quickly look away and turn an adorable shade of bubblegum pink?

Men will look at the person they are most attracted to when in a room. We’re very visual creatures.

2. Body language is one of the signs a guy has feelings for you

Did you know that 90% of what a person is communicating is non-verbal? Body language is real and can tell you a lot about how someone feels.

Pay attention to what he does with his body the next time you’re together (without staring too much!).

Signs he has romantic feelings for you include standing near you, positioning his face and body in front of you, leaning in when you’re talking to close the gap, and mirroring whatever you’re doing with your body.

3. He wants to know everything about you

Is this guy always asking you questions? Does it feel like he’s an undercover Inspector Clouseau hunting out your favorite interests, passions, dreams, and pet peeves? You jokingly tell him you had a wild weekend and bought some new bed linen, and you’ve never encountered anyone more interested in thread counts than he is.

Does he care about bed linen? Probably not. But this shows he cares about you, he wants to feel emotionally closer to you, and it’s one of the signs he has strong feelings for you.

4. He makes excuses to be close to you

How do you know if a guy has secret feelings for you?

He’ll always be there, not in a stalker kind of way, but in a comforting, familiar way.

He’ll take a seat next to you when you host a dinner party, want to be your teammate when you’re goofing around as a group playing board games; he’ll show up when you invite him to events (even if they’re not his thing) and ask you to help him shop for new clothes at the mall.

Why? Because he’ll take every opportunity he gets to be around the woman he’s attracted to.

5. He tries to make you laugh

Men frequently use humor to make the women they like happy because they want nothing more than to see you smile or hear you laugh and know that they are the source of your pleasure.

If comedy isn’t one of his gifts, brace yourself for corny dad jokes and cheesy one-liners. You’ll still be laughing, but maybe not with him…

signs that he has feelings for you

6. His phone does not exist when you’re around

How do you know a guy has feelings for you if he won’t come right out and say it?

When he’s with you, his attention will be locked on you. And that means he won’t be checking his phone every five minutes, answering calls, or surfing the net. You probably won’t see his phone. Does he even own a phone? Who knows. But either way, this guy is a breath of fresh air compared to those other guys you’ve dated who can’t make it through a 60-minute lunch date without replying to an “urgent” email 🙄.

7. He’s acting weird when you’re together

Looking for signs he has strong feelings for you but is scared to confess them?

One of the obvious signs is that he’ll start acting a bit strange.

Maybe he seems a little more nervous than usual and starts fumbling with his words or getting a little sweatier than usual. Or perhaps he goes the other way, becomes extra confident, and starts randomly belting out hits from your favorite musical.

Whatever he’s doing, it’s weird, and it’s out of character for him.

8. It seems like he’s always mincing his words

Do you ever get the feeling that this man wants to say something important to you, but for whatever reason, he doesn’t?

Maybe he shrugs it off or says, “it’s nothing,” or mumbles something inaudible, and when you ask him what he said, he tells you it doesn’t matter?

This is because he desperately wants to tell you he likes you, but he keeps hitting a wall every time he comes close to doing so.

9. He flirts with you

How do I know if he has feelings for me?

Well, does he flirt with you?

Some guys are just Joey Tribbiani types, and flirting will be their default setting. He’ll flirt with the waitress, his assistant, and even his Great aunt-Mural. But the rest of us? We only flirt when we’re attracted to a woman.

Signs he’s flirting: being extra charming, playful, and maybe even joking about the two of you getting together.

is he flirting

10. He compliments you

Does this guy often sing your praises? Is he the first to congratulate you on a promotion, notice that you got your hair styled in a new way, or tell you that you look great when you’ve made an extra special effort to wear a dress instead of your usual white shirt and tailored pants combo?

Compliments, especially non-physical ones, are one of the signs he has strong feelings for you.

11. Signs a guy has feelings for you: he wants to help you

When a man likes you as more than just a friend, he will go out of his way to help you in any way he can. This might mean fixing that leaky tap in your house, helping you lift a bag of heavy groceries, or giving you a ride in his car (even if it’s way out of the way).

Let’s say this guy loathes shopping for clothes. But you tell him that you need to pick an outfit for Lucy’s upcoming wedding, and he says, “shall we go shopping together?” Nothing screams “I’ve got feelings for you” louder than a straight man who volunteers to go clothes shopping with a woman who is guaranteed to try on 36 different dresses and then decide to buy the first thing she tried on.

12. He texts you first to tell you good news

Are you always the first to find out when something big happens in this man’s life?

He reaches a big goal in his business, and he calls you to celebrate.

He finally books that solo trip to India that he has been talking about doing forever, and he can’t wait to tell you.

He took his first-ever selfie and sent it to you with the caption, “just took my first selfie—on a scale of 1-10, how impressed are you 😉?”

You’ll often receive texts or calls from him that start with “guess what?!” because he wants to share his good news with someone he knows will be just as excited for him as he is!

13. He invites you into his world

How does a man act when he’s falling in love?

He starts making you a part of his plans. That means he’ll introduce you to friends, family, and maybe even his colleagues at work. He’ll share his favorite hobbies and interests with you. Maybe he’ll even show you around the town he grew up in.

A man won’t invite someone into his world like this unless he has strong feelings for you and sees you as part of his future. So if you have no idea if this guy even has a family, chances are he’s just not that into you.

14. He asks your opinion when making decisions

“What should I wear for this big presentation at work? Red tie with a white shirt, or blue tie with a pink shirt?”

“I can’t decide where to travel next: France or Japan?”

“What do you want me to cook for brunch on the weekend? Pancakes or waffles or both?”

When a guy has strong feelings for you, your opinion will mean more to him than most people’s; plus, he wants to get you more involved in his life, hence the 101 questions.

15. He’s ultra-protective of you

If you want to know how to tell how a man feels about you, see if he’s acting like a protective older brother around you. For example, if a guy is hitting on you and won’t take no for an answer, he might politely step in and pretend that he’s your boyfriend (and wishes he is). He might casually put his arm around you when you’re crossing the street together to ensure you’re safe. He might send you a text to check you got home okay when he knows you’re out late. He’ll act nonchalant about all of these things, “Oh what, this? This is nothing. I do this for every woman I know.”

Lies.

Men are hard-wired to protect the people they love. So if he’s more protective of you than others are, he might have stronger feelings for you than you think.

how to know if a guy has feelings for you

16. He has feelings for you if he gets green-eyed when other guys are in the picture

Have you ever been out at the same venue together and started chatting to another guy? Of course, you have, because you’re a beautiful, high-value woman—who wouldn’t want to talk to you!

Before you know it, you’re laughing at his jokes, maybe even flirting a little, and having a great time (classic Little Love Step #3).

And out of nowhere, his mood changes. He gets quiet, sullen, or maybe he tells you that you can do better than that guy.

The bottom line is that he cannot handle seeing another guy in the picture when he has feelings for you.

17. He’s extra chivalrous with you

Some guys are true gentlemen, and they will always behave chivalrously around other women, whether it’s their sister, co-worker, or girlfriend. But one of the signs he has strong feelings for you is he will go the extra mile with his chivalry. Maybe that means he regularly treats you to drinks or dinner but doesn’t do the same for his other female friends. Maybe he always holds the umbrella directly above your head when it’s raining, even though he’s ruining his fancy suit. Maybe he has shown up at your door with surprises like smoked salmon bagels or lattes or tickets to the theater more times than you can remember.

You get special treatment from him, and if you’re being honest with yourself, it feels good, right?

18. If he has strong feelings for you he will try to impress you

Sometimes, men do stupid things to impress the women they’re attracted to. Usually, they don’t know you well enough at this point to have genuine feelings and are just trying to leapfrog into your bed. But other times, when the feelings are real, they’ll do sweet things to impress you, like offer to lift heavy boxes for you when you move apartments, show you how to change the oil in your car, or take you to this beautiful, idyllic viewpoint in the city that no one else knows about.

19. People often tell you that you’d make a cute couple

Do all your friends and family frequently tell you that you’d make a great couple?

Maybe random people who don’t know you assume that you are a couple when you’re together?

Maybe someone tried to set you two up on a blind date. You both turned up; you laughed out loud, then he fake laughed but inside, he was thinking, “this is a clear sign from the Universe that we are meant to be together.”

Sometimes, our friends and family (and even strangers) have a sixth sense about these things and can pick up on chemistry before we do. Other times, real feelings may have been spilled in confidence, and they’re trying to play cupid.

20. Signs his feelings are growing for you: he remembers little things you tell him

Looking for more signs he has strong feelings for you? Think about if he remembers the things you tell him.

When a guy is falling for you, he will hang on your every word.

He’ll remember how you got that tiny scar on your left wrist. He’ll remember that you’re terribly allergic to prawns and will leave them out of the paella he cooks you for dinner. And he’ll remember that balloons freak you out because when you were little, you were blowing one up, and it burst in your face and scared the bejesus out of you. Never again.

21. He keeps in contact with you

Sometimes he calls, texts, and maybe even likes and comments on your social media posts. He prefers spending time with you in real life, but when you’re apart, you can bet he’ll keep in contact every way he can.

Why?

Because he wants to stay at the forefront of your mind, and he doesn’t want some other guy walking into your life and making him a distant memory.

signs he has strong feelings for you through text

22. He opens up to you

Remember what I said earlier about men keeping their most intimate feelings under lock and key?

It’s not just you he’s hiding his feelings and emotions from—he puts on a brave display to everyone else, including his nearest and dearest.

So, on the rare occasions when he does open up, you can guarantee you’re important to him.

Maybe he shares a memory from his childhood, an embarrassing story, or one of his deepest fears. Most people don’t know about it, but he’s comfortable enough to share it with you.

23. He is by your side

Only during our moments of need and the darker days do we find out who our true friends are. So, if a man is always there for you when you need him (even if it’s 4 AM and there’s a blizzard outside and he has to shovel ten inches of snow), it’s a sign he has strong feelings for you.

He hasn’t quite mustered the courage to share his true feelings with you, but what he can do is show you how much he cares about you by consistently showing up.

24. He’s happy doing nothing with you

Silence can sometimes be an awkward experience when you’re uncomfortable and surrounded by people you don’t like very much. But when you’re with someone you like a lot, even silence is enjoyable.

So, does he seem content just spending time in your company?

Is he happy with natural pauses in conversation when you’re out for lunch?

Does he still try to spend time with you even when you’ve got nothing planned?

This is one of the many signs he has strong feelings for you.

25. He is honest about his feelings for you

Does he have feelings for you? Sometimes, when a man does have strong feelings for a woman, he will tell her in a roundabout way.

He might tell you how much he values your friendship, loves spending time with you, or is ready and looking for a serious relationship.

Combine these words with the other signs on this list, and you’ve got an almost-open admission of how he feels about you. What else do you need? A surprise flash mob performance when you’re at the office?

Conclusion

Now that you know the signs to look out for that a man has strong feelings for you, the question is, do you have strong feelings for him too?

If the answer is yes, but you’re just friends, don’t be afraid to gently bring it up in conversation, or even take the lead and suggest going on a date to see if there’s a connection. And if you’re already dating, think about whether you are ready to take that next step and become exclusive (also known as Little Love Step #6).

What do you think is the clearest sign that a man has strong feelings for a woman? Tell me all in the comments below!

signs he has strong feelings for you



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Anxious Attachment Style – Here are 3 Strategies to Attracting Healthy Love

Anxious Attachment Style - Here are 3 Strategies to Attracting Healthy Love


Are you what the environment would explain as a needy dater?

You obtain on your own seeking to regulate every thing.

You wrestle to continue to be quiet and self-confident when you’re apart from a dude you are courting.

The worst portion is that commonly, you have only gone out with this man a couple of instances. You’re not in a connection, and you are not exclusive.

He goes out for boys’ night time, it is 1 AM, and you nevertheless haven’t had a text back again from him, so you blow up his phone 32 situations.

The last voicemail you leave sounds a thing like this: “WTF, Adam, you a**gap, wherever are you? Who are you with? What are you performing? You are with that woman Brandy, are not you? I knew you were being lying to me when you stated you have been just friends. Why can not you at any time remedy your damn mobile phone? I’m blocking your variety. We’re accomplished.”

Then you connect with him once more.

I want you to know that even if gentlemen have labeled you “crazy” for behaving like this, you are not nuts. You just have what we phone an nervous attachment model.

Want to dig deeper into what this is and how not to be so anxious when you are courting? Look at out this online video:

https://www.youtube.com/view?v=LZBE57NiVzU

In my Adore Accelerator Software, I educate solitary women who are looking for like the Little Really like Actions. And these actions will assistance you function with your nervous attachment model and avoid you from getting hurt again.

You will not treatment if he’s out for boys’ night time and you have not read from him for the reason that he’ll just be a person of quite a few guys you’re viewing.

You will not be blowing up anyone’s mobile phone 32 occasions yet again simply because you basically will not have time—you’ll be out on too a lot of dates.

You won’t be phased even if you practically pass this male on the road canoodling with Brandy. You will probably be canoodling with some other dude anyway.

Verify out my basic techniques to attract nutritious really like if you have an nervous attachment design.

Your Mentor,

Anxious Attachment Style - Here are 3 Strategies to Attracting Healthy Love



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16 Signs He Likes You But Is Hiding It (And What To Do Next)

16 Signs He Likes You But Is Hiding It (And What To Do Next)


Are you looking for signs he secretly likes you but is hiding it? There are many reasons why a guy might be hiding attraction, and he likes you but doesn’t want you to know. But how can you tell whether he’s really into you or just wants to be good friends?

Why is he hiding his feelings?

He’s confused about his feelings

The first reason why a guy might be hiding his real feelings from you is that he’s a little confused about them himself. He’s not sure how much he likes you yet or is slightly in denial, and he needs some time to work this all out.

He’s afraid you won’t feel the same way

Another reason why a guy likes you but hides it is he’s scared that you don’t feel the same way. Nobody likes rejection. And if he’s a little shy or low in confidence already, he might struggle to voice his feelings out of fear of looking like a fool and getting hurt.

One or both of you are already in a relationship

If you or he are in a relationship, then the respectful thing to do is to keep any feelings you have on the down low. It’s not fair to you or your significant other(s).

If you both like each other, the right thing to do is end your relationships before you even think of getting together. Newsflash: If the idea of being with someone else is even a tiny bit attractive, then you’re definitely in the wrong relationship.

He doesn’t want to ruin your friendship

Are you already good friends? Have you known each other a long time, or have you been through a lot together? Making a move from friends to something more is always tricky. If you decide to go for it, your friendship will never be the same again, and worse, you might lose it altogether. So it makes sense that he would want to tread very carefully and might be hiding his feelings.

He knows he’s not ready for a relationship

If all signs say that he likes you but is hiding it, that’s not always good. He might like you but still be hung up on another woman or know he’s not ready to commit to anyone. The good news is, he’s aware of it and is putting you first—kudos to that dude.

You’ve been there before and it didn’t end well

The final reason why he likes you but is hiding it is that he’s an ex, and you’ve already been there, done that, and bought the t-shirt. Things didn’t work out last time, and he’s apprehensive about giving it another go. Even if he has feelings for you, he knows that’s not always enough to make a relationship work.

16 signs he likes you but is hiding it

Here are things guys do when they secretly like you.

1. Eye contact

Does he quickly turn away and maybe even blush when you look at him?

When you sneakily peer at him from the corner of your eye, is he full-on staring at you?

This is one of the most unmistakable signs he likes you but is hiding it. A man can’t help but focus his attention on the woman he is most interested in, no matter where he is. And even though he might think he’s been oh-so-subtle, he may as well walk around holding a giant sign that says, “I’m into you, (your name).”

Look out for other body language cues that he secretly has feelings for you.

2. He flirts and teases you

Does he like me but is hiding it?

Pay attention to all signs of flirting.

That includes when he notices little things that you say or do, when he compliments you (especially on something non-physical), and when he playfully teases you.

Teasing and joking around is one of the easiest ways for a guy to flirt with you without being too direct. So, if the two of you always have good banter, that’s a strong sign he might have caught feelings.

3. He does more than follow you on social media

I can't tell if he likes me

Friends follow you on social media, but a guy who likes you? He’ll do more than that.

He’ll always like, comment on and share your posts, even if they’re from yonks ago. He’ll support pages that belong to you, whether for a business or a charity event. He’ll watch and respond to your stories. He’ll frequently slide into your DMs—especially if he doesn’t yet have your mobile number. And even if he does have your number, social media can seem less direct and invasive, so if he’s trying to hide his feelings, this may be his preferred form of contact.

4. He shows you a different side of himself

How do you know if a guy secretly likes you? Another key indicator is that he transforms Jekyll & Hyde-style into a different person when he’s around you compared to when he’s with his friends, family, or coworkers.

Perhaps he becomes a little quieter or more nervous. Maybe he seems kinder and more attentive. Or he may even be more fun and confident when he’s with you.

If you began as friends and have noticed a shift in his behavior, that’s also a clear sign his feelings have changed. Maybe there’s now tension between you, or everything feels more intense.

5. His attention is 100% focused on you

One of the most telling signs he likes you but is hiding it is if you feel like his attention is entirely on you when you’re together. He isn’t checking out other women. He isn’t picking up his phone to read his messages or take calls. When you’re together, it feels like you have his undivided attention, and this is rare.

But this can be a good thing and a bad thing because he will literally notice everything. That piece of spinach wedged in your teeth. That day you got a little heavy-handed with your eyebrow pencil. That time you stacked it on the pavement and fell over head first on your way to meet him in the park. Yep, he sees it all.

6. He listens to you (and remembers)

how to know he likes you but hides it

Next up on our list of signs a guy likes you but is hiding it is he listens to and remembers pretty much every word you have ever said to him. The random Tuesday months ago when you told him about your fear of bagels. Last week when you told him about that guy you’re talking to (okay, he listened to this one, but that doesn’t mean he’s happy about it). Your favorite color, restaurant, outfit, book—the more you’ve spoken to this guy, the more facts he collects about you. Not in a creepy stalkerish way, but in an I-can’t-get-enough-of-you and everything-you-say-is-important-to-me kind of way.

When a guy likes you, he will go out of his way to ask you questions and learn more about who you are. And he’s not just doing it to pretend that he cares; he does care, and the proof is in the little things he remembers.

7. He keeps in contact regularly

Does this guy text you almost every day, find a way to chat to you at work, or regularly hit you on social media?

Here’s the deal: regular friends usually don’t talk that often. Think about how often you talk to your friends. Every few days? Once a week? Maybe even less, depending on how much you like them?

But this guy is consistent. He’ll go out of his way to find things for you to chat about, keep asking questions, and try to initiate conversations all the time.

Why? Because he loves talking to you. And he wants to stay at the forefront of your mind and make sure you don’t forget about him, even when you’re on that hot date with hot Sam Friday night. Especially then.

8. He finds a way to hang out with you

Another of the telltale signs he likes you but is hiding it is if he goes out of his way to be physically near you. Maybe that means he always sits near you in a meeting at work, or if you’re out as a group of friends, he’ll often walk with you, or you end up running into him at your favorite places (because he knows they’re your favorite places remember—he listens to everything you say!). He leaves a party at the same time you do, he offers to give you a ride (even when it’s totally out of his way), and if you’re ever organizing anything, you can count on him showing up.

9. He gets close to you

man and woman flirting

When a guy is attracted to you, he will subconsciously move closer to you. He’ll lean in when you’re talking, sit next to you, and maintain eye contact. Maybe he’ll lightly brush your arm or a loose strand of hair out of your face or hug you. He wants to be close to you, so he’ll get as close as possible without being weird.

This is also him testing the waters a little. When he hugs you, do you hug him back? When he lightly brushes your arm, do you feel something brewing in the air? He’s trying to get you to see him as more than just some guy.

10. He helps you

Does this guy go out of his way to help you?

One of the signs he likes you but is hiding it is he is always there to lend a hand any time you need it.

Maybe you moved house, and he helped you lift heavy boxes or drive a rental van across town. Your laptop froze on that blue screen of death, and he helped fix it. You’ve got a big dilemma at work, and he’s there to listen and give you some sage advice. Your car breaks down in the middle of nowhere, and he comes to pick you up. You’re organizing a big charity event in your community, and he offers to hang up flyers with you on a Saturday afternoon.

He cares about you and wants to be there for you in any way he can. He wants to be the first person you call anytime you need help.

11. He doesn’t mention other women

Think back on the conversations you’ve had with this guy.

Has he ever mentioned any other women romantically?

Another of the signs your guy friend likes you but is hiding it is if he keeps his love life as private as possible.

He doesn’t want you to think he’s interested in anyone else. Depending on how much he likes you, he might not have eyes for anyone else.

If he’s dating, he might share stories of disastrous dates and how he’s just not met the right person. He might also casually drop in that he’s single into your conversation, in case you weren’t sure. Or maybe he goes a step further and says he thinks the best relationships begin with best friends. FYI: he’s talking about you and him.

12. He gets jealous when you mention other guys

Following on from the point above, he doesn’t mention other women, and hearing you talk about other guys can set him off.

Whether you’re talking to another guy, going on dates, or even in a relationship, he doesn’t like it. And he’ll probably try and mask his jealousy and play it down, but underneath it all, he can’t stand it.

He might encourage you to question whether you’re with the right guy or make fun of the guys you’ve dated in the past. The bottom line is that he doesn’t want you to be with anyone else. No one will ever be good enough for you (apart from him, of course).

13. But he does want to know your relationship status

If a guy likes you but is hiding it, he’ll still want frequent updates on your relationship status to ensure he has a green light before putting himself out there. The last thing he wants to do is bulldoze in and ask you out only to hear you’ve already got a boyfriend: #awkward.

He might be direct and ask you if you’re seeing anyone or be more subtle and ask you what your type is. You may also notice him trying to emulate what you’ve described as your dream man. For example, if you tell him you want to meet an adventurous guy, he might start learning mandarin in his spare time or going rock climbing. If you tell him you want a guy who makes you laugh, he might come at you non-stop with jokes.

“Why did the banana go out with the prune?” he says.

“I don’t know,” she says.

“Because it couldn’t get a date.”

Mic drop.

14. He tries to impress you

is he trying to impress me

Does he like me but is hiding it? Well, does he go out of his way to impress you? Because if he does, then the answer is probably a big fat yes.

He pays careful attention to his appearance when he’s with you. Maybe you notice he’s bought a new shirt, done something different with his hair, or started wearing cologne.

He also (gently) brags about his achievements, like a promotion at work, acing a test, or hitting a goal in his business.

And he’ll do his best to show you he’s boyfriend material. He’ll open doors for you, offer you his jacket when you’re cold, be kind and respectful, and do his best to always do the right thing.

15. He’s supportive

Although he might be hiding that he likes you in a romantic way, his true feelings will come out in his actions. He will always be by your side and on your side, no matter what. He will encourage you to chase your dreams and help you achieve your goals, and take a genuine interest in supporting you in everything you do.

Maybe you decide one day that you want to open a cake shop. He’ll be there in your kitchen, sampling that first cake you make and telling you it’s delicious even though you know you majorly messed up the recipe and the dog has taken a hard pass on it.

Why?

Because he wants to champion you and help you believe in yourself the way he believes in you.

16. He makes jokes about liking you.

The final sign he likes you but is hiding it?

He makes jokes about liking you, asking you out, and dating you.

He’ll do it in such a casual, low-key way that if you react badly, he’ll just dismiss it as a joke and say he didn’t mean it. This way, his ego won’t take a public beating.

And if you react positively, he might test the waters a few more times. Once he feels confident enough that you’re not going to laugh in his face, he might confess his feelings or ask you out.

If he likes you but is hiding it, what should you do?

Okay, first things first, does this guy meet your love vision? What I mean by that is, when you think of the kind of man and relationship you want to attract, is he a good match? If you want to avoid getting into the wrong relationship, you have to make sure you choose to date the right men—the men who align with your values and the future you want to build.

If he does meet your love vision, then take some time to think about what this guy might be afraid of. Why is he hiding his feelings from you?

For example, if it’s a fear of losing your friendship, you could tell him that you think friendship is a great way to start a relationship. If it’s a fear of rejection, go out of your way to reciprocate his behavior (smile back, make eye contact, listen to him, tease him, etc.). And if you think he’s too shy and insecure ever to find the courage to ask you out, don’t be afraid to make the first move.

However, if he’s hiding his feelings because he’s afraid of commitment or not ready for a relationship right now, don’t put your life on pause and wait around for him to be ready. It doesn’t matter how much he likes you; if he’s not in the right headspace, he’s not going to be able to give you what you want. It’s time to yell NEXT and move on. Leave yourself open to meeting a man who is ready to commit to you.

Conclusion

Now that you’re all clued up on the signs a guy might like you but is hiding it, it’ll be far easier to spot the difference between a guy who likes you as a friend and a guy who likes you a heap more.

Is there a guy in your life who you think might secretly like you but is hiding it? What signs have you spotted from this article, and why do you think he’s hiding his feelings?

Tell me all about it in the comments below, ladies!

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Why the drain fills quickly?

why-the-drain-fills-quickly

Initially, the drain tank is a septic tank in which the waste decomposes and becomes water that is absorbed by the soil – Αποφράξεις Πειραιάς -. But why does the cesspool fill up so fast? Many absorption pits lose their absorbency over time. The reason; The concentration of puri on the walls of the septic tank seals it, as a result of which its absorption is reduced and it fills up quickly. Frequent septic tank evacuations cause disturbance but also stench in the space. This problem, as time goes by, worsens even more and the solution must be drastic!

What methods can you use to deal with the problem?

There are many ways to deal with a rapidly filling septic tank. Below we have gathered the basic methods, in order to find the one that best suits your space.

Use of biological or chemical fluid

This method is simple, but needs to be applied frequently to the plumbing system to solve the problem. You apply a chemical or biological liquid that removes the cigar from the walls and the bottom of the filling pit, while its absorption is partially restored. The cleaning of the septic tank is done by the fermentation caused by the preparations in the waste, at the same time reducing the stench. The total cost depends on the absorbency and the age of the septic tank. This method is the most economical and the most immediate in dealing with the problem, but with frequent use of the preparations every few months.

With proper and professional drainage maintenance at regular intervals, the cigar will not have time to accumulate on the walls of the septic tank and thus its operation will be effective in the long run, without problems.

Sealing of the septic tank

With this solution the pit will not be filled with rainwater. This way it will not be filled with water even when the aquifer rises from the weather. For this method to work, it must first be preceded by a professional septic tank cleaning and then reinforced with special concrete. The cost is high and depends mainly on the size of the pit, but the results are permanent.

Conversion of the septic tank into a biological wastewater treatment plant

This solution is the most costly, but you will never need sewer maintenance again! By converting a septic tank to an organic one, the stench as well as the possibility of calling a tank to empty the septic tank effectively disappears. The same goes for chemical and biological preparations, which you will not need to reuse! Its cost depends on the number of people who will use it, while the water produced can be used for underground watering of plants.

How often should a sewer be serviced?

If you choose to maintain your sewer in a natural way with home solutions, you will need to do it often enough, so that the sewer does not clog. In other words, you have to do maintenance and cleaning, at least once a month, to keep it in good condition.

On the other hand, professional sewer cleaning offers more radical results, with longer duration. A sewer maintenance by professionals, as long as it is done once or twice a year, to avoid damage to the sewer and to delay the time when you will need a blockage.

How is sewer cleaning done by water jet?

Any experienced workshop can undertake the cleaning of the sewer with pressure blocking machines. The procedure followed is very simple, but should be done only by experienced professionals, for maximum safety and avoidance of damage.

Water purification of the drain is done by discharging water into the pipes with high pressure. Of course, this is done with the help of a special pressing machine, which can provide the necessary pressure for the water, removing any debris from the sewer parts and cleaning them.

However, great care is needed in where the water jet is applied for sewer maintenance. If your pipes are old, worn, or made of poor quality materials, water jetting may not be the ideal idea for you. Consult an experienced obstruction team, to suggest the best solution for your needs.

For what reasons is the sewer clogged?

The sewer cleaning of an apartment building, a detached house and every building is necessary. With a preventive check, at least 1-2 times a year, you can avoid more serious damage. There are some common suspects responsible for clogged pipes and drains, most of the time:

  • Food leftovers in the sink
  • Hair in the bathtub and sink
  • Soap and fats in the bathroom
  • Papers in the toilet bowl
  • Broken piping and building materials
  • Plants and tree roots in the manhole
  • Diapers and sanitary napkins in the basin
  • Baby wipes in the sewer

The above will definitely lead you to the need for sewer maintenance, in a short time. Only an experienced sewer maintenance team will effectively get rid of the problem and offer you useful tips for taking care of your sewer.

See more about unclogging:

What Is An Exclusive Relationship Really? 14 Signs You’re In One

What Is An Exclusive Relationship Really? 14 Signs You're In One


What does it mean to be exclusive in a relationship, and how do you know you’re in one? As a dating coach, I work with many women who often tell me they assume they’re in an exclusive relationship with a guy, only to find out a few weeks or months later that he is still hooking up with other women.

If you find yourself constantly confused about where you stand when dating and in relationships, this article is for you. I’ll be breaking down what a mutually exclusive relationship is vs. a non-exclusive relationship, an exclusive relationship vs. committed relationship and how to end the confusion for good.

No more wondering if you’re just hanging out, having fun, or if this guy is actually your boyfriend. No more telling yourself (or other people) he’s your boyfriend until you know for sure that he is.

What does it mean to be exclusive?

Is it possible to be exclusively dating but not in a relationship?

Yes.

Being exclusive with someone means that neither of you is romantically pursuing anyone else. It’s a discussion you have and a decision you make together, usually after a few months of dating many people (Little Love Step #4) and realizing that this guy is special. You don’t yet know if he’s your person, but there’s a strong possibility that he might be.

However, when you have this discussion, it does not mean you’re automatically in a relationship and are slapping the labels “boyfriend” and “girlfriend” on. Some couples may be ready to do that, but others won’t be, which is why you need to make sure you talk about this openly and honestly with one another. DO NOT walk away from that conversation feeling confused. Keep talking until you both understand where you stand. I don’t care if he has to pick up his laundry or get his labradoodle a haircut—he is not leaving that room until he gives you clear answers.

If you notice he keeps skirting around the conversation and being super sketchy, it’s probably because he’s not ready to be exclusive with you but doesn’t have the courage to say it to your face. You can do better than this guy. Don’t chase him.

Congratulations! You just avoided a love rat. Take two steps back to Little Love Step #4, and start dating more high-quality guys.

Exclusive dating vs. relationship

So, how does this whole exclusive dating thing work if you’re not actually in a relationship yet?

It means you’re enjoying spending time with each other, deepening your connection, and slowly building intimacy. You’re not swiping on dating apps or trying to juggle three dates with three different guys in one night anymore. Your long-term goal is probably to commit to each other in an exclusive relationship, but you’re not putting pressure on yourselves to label it as official just yet.

The great part about this step is there are no external distractions from other potential suitors. And this doesn’t feel like a restriction. You’ve lost interest in logging on to dating apps, and you don’t really notice that hot barista in your coffee house anymore. Well… not as much as you used to anyway…

Removing everyone else from the equation allows you to discover more about each other’s lifestyles, habits, and quirks. For example, are you okay with how loudly he snores at night? Is he alright with eating gluten-free, dairy-free, low-sugar everything when he comes to your place? Are you truly compatible? Is this thing gonna work? Can he survive without cheese?

Okay, so what is an exclusive relationship?

old couple in love

I’m so glad you asked.

An exclusive relationship is a step that comes after dating someone exclusively for a while. There’s no set timeline for this, but you’ll start to know when you want to make things more official. You’re ready to call this guy your boyfriend, introduce him to the fam and send out a holiday card of you wearing matching festive onesies.

So, what should your next move be?

Verbally solidify the relationship (have the talk) and consciously decide to commit solely to each other.

Woohoo!

You’re finally official and planning your future together as a couple—this is what I call Little Love Step #6.

Are you ready to make your relationship exclusive?

Let’s say you’re dating someone, you like him a lot, he meets your love vision (Little Love Step #2), and you can see a potential future here.

How do you know when you’re ready to be in an exclusive relationship?

My advice is not to rush into this step. It will usually happen naturally after a few months of dating lots of different guys. Avoid putting all your eggs in one basket too soon, and make sure you get to know each other properly and determine whether there’s real potential here (Little Love Step #5). He might be everything you’ve ever been searching for, but if he’s off to China in two months to work at a panda sanctuary for the next year, you’ll have to think seriously about if you can make it work.

Yes, pandas are cute. But a long-distance relationship? Not so cute.

Signs you’re ready for exclusivity

Here are some sure-fire signs that you’re ready to take things to the next level.

You spend a lot of time together

Are you talking to each other every day? Do you see each other multiple times each week? Do you spend a lot of your weekends together?

If you are already taking up a significant amount of space in each other’s lives, this is a sign you might be ready for an exclusive, committed relationship.

exclusively dating but not in a relationship

You’ve argued and resolved it

Every couple argues. I don’t care if someone tells you they don’t; I’m calling bullsh*t. Arguments are inevitable and a part of any healthy relationship. You’re not the same people, so of course, you’re going to, at times, clash, disagree, or have misunderstandings.

What’s important is how you handle those blowups when they happen. Are you able to communicate clearly and calmly with one another? Are you able to agree to disagree (instead of always needing to be right or to win) and move forward without any grudges or resentment?

“YOU ATE MY LAST POP TART?!”

“Yeah, it was good.”

“BUT IT WAS MY POP TART.”

“Is this about the pop tart or the rough week you’ve had at work?”

“You’re right. I’m sorry. Let’s never fight over toaster pastries again.”

When you argue and resolve it in a mature, respectful way, it will only strengthen your relationship.

You see this person in your future

Have you talked about the future? Are you being invited into his world, and have you invited him into yours? For example, have you planned an upcoming trip together? Is he coming to your brother’s 40th birthday party next month? Have you met any of his friends or family?

These are all examples of two people becoming more invested in one another, which will only happen if both of you see a real future here.

You don’t want to date other people

One of the clearest signs you’re ready for an exclusive relationship is when you have no interest in dating other people. If you are still dating other people, you constantly compare those guys to him.

What’s important here is that you are both at this stage. If you’re ready to delete Bumble, but he’s still going on multiple dates with other women each week, he’s probably not there yet.

What if he doesn’t get there within 2-4 months? Don’t wait around for him. Congratulations! You just recognized your value as a woman. Back to Little Love Step #4 again, DO get yourself back out there, and DO forget about this dope.

You’re ready for emotional intimacy

Are you slowly but surely opening up to each other more each day? Have you shared stories from your childhood, along with fears and dreams and secrets? Are you both ready to be truly seen?

If you want to know everything about him and are open to being vulnerable with him (and him with you), you might be ready for an exclusive relationship.

You’re sharing important parts of your life

Have you met each other’s best friends and families? When something great happens at work, do you instantly want to tell him? Does he know where the scar on your lower back came from? Have you taken him along with you to the kid’s hospital you volunteer at each month? Has he brought you to the cabin in the woods that he spent every summer in as a kid?

These are all examples of sharing important parts of your lives, and it means you’re ready for more than just dinner dates and morning after pop tarts.

You prioritize and make time for each other

The final sign you may just be ready for an exclusive relationship is that you are both actively prioritizing each other. You’re scheduling in regular dates, even if that means you leave the office an hour earlier than usual one night or he cuts back on guy time. This is essential because a relationship requires time and attention from both people to flourish.

how to have the talk

Signs you’re not ready for exclusivity

Here are some signs that you are definitely not ready for an exclusive relationship.

You cannot see a future

If marriage and kids are things you see in your future, can you picture doing those things with this man? Are those things that he even wants? Because if not, you’re only wasting each other’s time.

If you can’t see this person in your life for the long haul, making a more serious commitment to each other is the wrong move.

You still want to meet new people

Another telltale sign that you’re not ready for exclusivity is if you still want to meet new people. You’re wondering who else is out there. You think there’s a strong possibility there may be a better match for you out there. And you’re keen to stay on dating apps and sites and explore new connections.

There’s nothing wrong with this. What’s important is that you recognize it and are honest about it instead of trying to force yourself to do something you’re not ready for yet.

You feel pressure to be exclusive

There’s a LOT of pressure on women to find a man, settle down, get married, and have kids. Pressure from your parents, pressure from your loved-up friends, pressure from movies, and pressure from society. And all of this external pressure may lead to you putting pressure on yourself to make a commitment to someone for the wrong reasons, i.e., you’re afraid of ending up alone, you want someone to snuggle with on Sunday mornings, and you want your parents to stop setting you up with weird family friends.

The only advice I can give you is to work on Little Love Step #1: Build your sexy confidence to the point where you are not afraid to be single.

How to transition to an exclusive relationship

Is Exclusive the same as relationship?

Okay, so you think you’re ready to make things exclusive? Here’s how to have “the talk” so everyone knows where they stand and nobody feels like a fool.

Know what you want

Going into a conversation like this and saying something along the lines of, “what are we…?” is not helpful because it gives him all the power and leaves you in a position where you virtually have no say in it.

So, know what you want before you talk to him. And be clear about what that looks like.

Have the conversation in person

Do not try and have this chat via text messages or on the phone. There’s way too much room for miscommunication, you won’t be able to pick up on subtle cues in their body language, and it’s way too impersonal for this kind of topic.

Is it scarier to have this conversation face to face?

Yes.

But if you’re not ready to even have the conversation, then you’re not ready for exclusivity.

Be honest and unapologetic

“We’ve been dating for X months now, and I’d like to continue getting to know you on a deeper level because I think we have a special connection. I think I’m ready to take the next step in our relationship. How do you feel about that?”

This is a powerful way to begin the conversation. You’re being honest about how you feel, where your head’s at, and why you’re ready for the next step. This puts the ball in his court and forces him to tell you how he feels.

One of the most loving things you can do for yourself is to speak your truth and be open about your desires.

What if we don’t want the same things?

There’s always a chance that he might not want the same things you do, and that’s okay. You’re better off knowing now and feeling a little hurt and deflated instead of investing another month in this relationship and feeling like you’re in dating limbo.

It’s then up to you whether you’re happy to continue seeing where things go or whether you want to cut the cord and move on.

FYI: if you’ve been dating for six months or more and he still isn’t ready to make things exclusive, he’s wasting your time.

NEXT!

Common signs you’re in a loving exclusive relationship (Little Love Step #7)

  1. You’ve had the “Define the Relationship” talk. Without this, you are not in an exclusive relationship.
  2. You make future plans together.
  3. You’ve met each other’s friends and family and made a conscious effort with them.
  4. You’re not worried about texting first or double texting.
  5. They are the first person you want to call when you have good news or bad news, or even just mediocre, not relevant news.
  6. People now just assume that you are each others’ plus one for any event, party, or gathering.
  7. You use the terms boyfriend and girlfriend or partner.
  8. You are social media official.
  9. You spend most of your nights together; maybe you even have a toothbrush at his place. He probably doesn’t have one at yours, though, because guys are GROSS.
  10. You’ve deleted all the dating apps.
  11. You had a big argument about something and managed to resolve it like adults.
  12. You take care of each other when you’re sick.
  13. You stop saying “me” and “I” and find yourself saying “we” and “us.”

Conclusion

So, there should be no confusion regarding your dating life in the future. If you haven’t told each other you’re exclusively dating, or in an exclusive relationship, then you are not.

Have you ever assumed you were in an exclusive relationship before you’d had “the talk”? What happened? Tell me all in the comments below.

what does exclusive mean in a relationship



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